The Unintentional Deception
by Bleeding Lotus
Summary: Naruto was affected at birth by the Kyuubi, who had been sealed inside him a mere two minutes earlier. His similarities to the Kyuubi were the last straw, and the Hokage went senile. A more jaded, neglected and mature Naruto is noticed by a lazy genius when he’s put on the same team, and everything changes. Rated T for future violence and mentions of abuse. Slow burn Shika/Naru. AU
1. Noticed

"Team Seven: Naruto Uzumaki, Shikamaru Nara, and Ino Yamanaka," Iruka called, drawing a raised eyebrow from a certain lazy boy. "Team Eight: Hinata Hyūga, Shino Aburame, Kiba Inuzuka. Team Nine is still in commission. Team Ten: Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno, Choji Akimichi."

That was a surprise. Why did he split such a historic team up?

_They split the Ino-Shika-Cho trio up. Why did they put me and the banshee on a team with such a troublesome guy? _

Shikamaru wondered as a certain female shrieked indignantly, mulling through several scenarios he had managed to simulate in his head.

Iruka was surprised too. His expression barely changed, but it was there. He may be Chunin, but a sudden change like that excuses the lapse in emotional control.

_Must have been... not Mizuki, not the Principal... he knows the Hokage._

Shikamaru proceeded to stare at Naruto, looking for anything that might validate his theory.

Said blonde boy grew rather uncomfortable, considering the Nara he always saw with that lazy expression was looking at him with eyes that seemed to _stare into his soul_.

"Uh..." Naruto whispered to the boy next to him. "Something wrong?"

The Nara just snorted, then turned away.

_Why didn't I think of it earlier? I suppose it's not like many pay much attention to him anyways, but how'd he get those scars? He should be under the protection of Konoha, especially because he's the container. Does this have anything to do with his relationship with the Hokage? Maybe he somehow convinced the village leader that he was safe? Why would he do that? Not to mention the state of his clothes... how could no one notice anything? That's nearly impossible... unless..._

_Genjutsu? No. He doesn't have the chakra control for that. I suppose his personality is quite distracting..._

"You sure nothing's wrong, Shikamaru?" Naruto asked, interrupting the increasingly concerning thoughts.

_He's worried? And... is that..._

The Nara never thought the day would come that he heard a _tremor_ in Naruto's voice, and immediately felt like smashing his head into his desk.

_I haven't paid attention at all... he's really a master at hiding things. Not because of anything he does consciously._

_That's a clear sign of trauma. The scars... make sense, but only if the Hokage somehow fell for his misdirection as well..._

The idea almost took audible form as the pieces clicked into place.

_He calls the Third Jiji... the Hokage must have some type of attachment to him..._

_The Fourth. He looks just like him... I can't believe I never noticed that. Really, he's too good for his own good. That would explain the attachment, and a subconscious desire to see him in good health... the Kyuubi was sealed into the Fourth's son, he must feel responsible. I would think the Third would be able to realize this kind of thing, but he is getting quite old..._

Shikamaru had it all figured out, just from paying attention for a few minutes.

_That kid is admirable. I hate myself now. Why did I have to stumble upon something so troublesome?_He sighed.

_Troublesome conscience. I can't let this go like I would everything else._

_He's the Kyuubi container, for heaven's sake. That many scars... how evident they are..._

_There's no way I can let this go._

Shikamaru found himself with a brand new sensation, which he quickly found out was anger.

He showed no outward signs of distress, but a warm hand rested on his shoulder comfortingly.

"I don't know what's bothering you, but you can talk to me, okay?" Naruto offered gently, in a voice that seemed to radiate concern.

_You aren't allowed to be worried about me. Jesus Christ, what have I gotten myself into?_

Shikamaru grimaced, muttering his clan's favourite word.

"We're gonna be on the same team and all that, so we need to be able to trust each other, you know? I really wanna help, so you gotta tell me what's bothering you after class, okay?" He continued gently, smiling warmly at the Nara.

"Yeah." Shikamaru answered simply.

_We're sure as hell going to have a talk, and it's going to be a troublesome one._

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Naruto was so very confused.

"Wait, so that's all that was bothering you?" He asked confusedly. "You seemed... kind of angry. Tell me what's really going on." He pressed, receiving an exhausted groan.

_He may have developed the ability to interpret body language... I'm just not sure why, or how..._

"Naruto, I told you already. Is it so hard to believe?" Shikamaru asked, knowing the answer a split second after he voiced his question. The reason behind the disbelief only served to make him angrier.

"Well, I've had these ones for a while. How come you never got angry before?" Naruto reasoned, his face scrunching up in confusion. He paused for a moment, his expression growing solemn. "No one has." He spoke quietly.

_Great. My class is filled to the brim with idiots. How has no one noticed?_

"You'd think after all the times I've slept in class, and complained about troublesome things, that you'd know why. Paying attention to people is troublesome. As for the other idiots, they're stupid. Your personality is incredibly distracting, and they don't think to look any further. As for the Hokage, he feels bad. So he subconsciously ignores all the signs." Shikamaru explained, his voice growing more tired by the second.

"Wow. I think this is the most you've talked. Ever." Naruto commented, a hint of worry in his voice. "Is that bad? Are you sick? Do I need to take you to the hospital?" He asked frantically, his voice getting louder as he went on.

"No, no. I'm fine." Shikamaru reassured him. "It's just troublesome emotions. They make me tired." He explained, receiving an understanding look from the blonde.

"That's something I can relate to." He nearly whispered.

_Stupid, selfish, ignorant people!_

"When I watch the other kids with their parents..." he spoke sadly, his eyes filled to the brim with loneliness.

_Never again._

Shikamaru vowed to himself.

"Would you like to go somewhere? I was thinking, since we're going to be on the same team, we should try to get to know each other more. We can invite Ino too if you want." The Nara offered.

_I won't let him feel lonely ever again._

Naruto's eyes lit up, vibrating with his usual hyperactive energy.

"Yeah! Where do you wanna go?" He asked excitedly, looking like he wanted to jump up and down.

_He's got more self-restraint than I thought he did._

Shikamaru chuckled at the frenzied blonde, surprising even himself. He realized then, after analyzing his behaviour over the past hour...

_Seriously? Him?_

He sighed mentally, being sure not to show any outward signs that could lead to awkward questions.

"Wherever you do." He answered after a moment, receiving a patented Naruto grin.

"Ichiraku's it is, then!" He shouted happily, skipping towards the gate of the academy.

Shikamaru smiled slightly, following him at a more sedate pace.

After a few minutes, they arrived at a ramen stand with Naruto a few feet ahead of him.

The excitable blonde ushered him over impatiently, dragging him into the small, delicious smelling shop.

"Old man Teuchi!" He called happily, waving to the aged man behind the counter.

"Naruto." The man greeted warmly, a fond smile stretching his saggy skin.

Naruto hopped onto a stool, Shikamaru following suite much less hyperactively.

"What kind of ramen do you like?" The blonde asked, pointing to the many options on the menu.

"I'll have whatever you're having." He answered lazily, eliciting a giggle from Naruto.

"Lazy-bones here wants miso ramen too." He told Teuchi, taking a bulging frog wallet from his pocket.

Shikamaru brought his own out and selected enough bills to pay for the both of them.

"My treat." He smirked at the startled blonde, who was clearly about to protest. "Don't worry, it's my parents' money. They have more than enough." He assured the blonde, electing to switch the focus of Naruto's thoughts to avoid an argument. "Do you really like orange that much?" He asked abruptly, pointing at the jumpsuit.

Naruto frowned.

"Well, I figured that if I wore something different, then people would have no choice but to stop ignoring me." His frown deepened. "That's why I pranked people too."

_Stop being angry. It won't serve you right now. Let's just get rid of the orange kill-me suit._

"You know, now that you're a Genin, you should get something less troublesome. I mean, any enemy ninja with eyes will see you. It could get you killed." Shikamaru advised.

"I never thought about it like that," Naruto spoke thoughtfully. "I guess being ignorable is a good thing sometimes." He grinned, pictures running through his head of the coolest ninja outfits he could think of.

"I have a place in mind where you could get stuff like that." Shikamaru offered, hoping the nice girl he had seen there would welcome Naruto instead of shunning him.

"You sure they won't kick me out?" Naruto asked, grimacing from the bad memories.

"Even if they want to, they can't. I'll make sure of that." Shikamaru spoke dangerously.

Naruto smiled, rubbing the back of his head with a slight tinge of pink on his cheeks.

"Thank you, Shika." He grinned, clearly embarrassed.

_He doesn't even know what to do. I'm sure the only person who's done anything for him is the Hokage, and he's blinded himself with the selfish need to ignore Naruto's suffering._

Shikamaru thought angrily, his hands clenching into fists.

"No problem." He spoke calmly, stuffing his fury into the back of his mind and his hands into his pockets.

_There's a time and a place to be angry, and it isn't now or here._

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

They arrived at the Shinobi store, Higurashi Weapons, Naruto immediately running to something shiny that caught his eye.

Thankfully, Shikamaru was able to calm him down and get him to think about the things he would need for the present, as well as the future.

He eventually got the blonde to think practically, his outfit mostly black. Black gloves, black shirt, ninja tape and grey pants, with deep red sandals to match his scarf, which was apparently a gift from an anonymous person who broke into his house and... didn't steal _anything_.

He felt the intrigued stare of the girl behind the counter, relaxing minutely as he detected no malice. She seemed curious more than anything, which he allowed for the moment.

The hyperactive blonde put everything on the counter delicately. The girl- Tenten, judging from her name badge- raised an eyebrow, glancing between his atrocious orange jumpsuit and the Shinobi-like articles on the counter.

She didn't ask any questions and stuck to the professional greeting, something Shikamaru was thankful for as they left without trouble.

Somehow, they even left without Naruto chatting her ear off.

That was mostly thanks to his fascination with the patterns on his new clothes, which distracted him until they got out of the store.

"Wow, this is so cool! We're going to be the best team, you know!" He shouted, big crimson eyes shining in excitement.

The lazy Nara found it difficult to not stare into them, but he pulled his gaze away with great effort and made a noise of amusement.

"Say that after we get Ino to tolerate us." He sighed, thinking about how difficult she could be sometimes.

Well, all of the time, really.

"Leave it to me!" Naruto exclaimed confidently, giving his lazy friend a thumbs up. "I've got an idea."

Shikamaru nearly groaned.

The last time the Prankster King had an idea, the ANBU were itching for weeks. It made it quite difficult to execute missions. Nobody could prove it was Naruto, so he literally got away with stalling the mission rates of Konoha.

Hence the name Prankster King.

"What might this troublesome idea be?" He asked sceptically.

"Well, since we're meeting our sensei today, I thought we could bond over making training plans and stuff. We could even bring snacks. Everyone loves food." Naruto suggested brightly.

_That actually isn't a horrible idea._

"I'll start a few plans for training, since I know most of the abilities you two have from the academy." Shikamaru volunteered, something he never thought he'd do until now. "Bring anything but ramen." He added as an afterthought, remembering how Ino always complained about the smell of ramen from Naruto's 'Leaning Tower of Ramen Cups'.

"How about salad? Ino's on a diet, right?" Naruto asked thoughtfully.

The Nara nearly gaped at him, but stopped himself.

_He's more observant than I thought._

"I'm sure she'd appreciate the gesture, I've listened to her ramble on and on about it. Make sure to get the low fat stuff." He suggested.

Naruto nodded, grinning brightly.

"Okay, see you in a couple hours!" He shouted happily, waving with a wide smile.

Shikamaru waved back, unable to suppress a smile of his own.

The smile faded as he thought about Naruto's circumstances, and he vowed to figure out just what the hell was going on.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Team Seven waited in the classroom, all of the other students having left hours ago.

"They're late." Ino huffed, glaring at the door.

"No, really?" Shikamaru drawled, his head on the desk and his eyes half closed.

Naruto, who was standing near the door, took one look at the board eraser and laughed evilly.

"I know it's tempting, and you have reason to, but please don't." Shikamaru sighed exasperatedly.

"Why not?" The blonde asked quizzically, staring longingly at the eraser.

"If you make our sensei hate you, he might not bother with training." He explained.

Naruto whimpered dejectedly, sprawling across one of the desks and falling asleep instantly, judging from the loud snores that came only a second later.

Just as Shikamaru began to follow suit, Ino slammed her hand on his desk.

"I am not going to just stand here and wait for this slacker to 'grace' us with his presence!" She shouted angrily, dragging him out of his desk and halfway across the room before something stopped her.

Their new sensei leaned on the doorframe, completely unrepentant of his tardiness.

"You're late!" Ino shrieked, waking up Naruto who emulated her upon seeing the silver-haired man.

"How do I say this..." he spoke calmly. "You're all... a bunch of idiots."

Ino's hand lost its grip, and Shikamaru fell flat on his face.

"Meet me on the roof in five minutes." He commanded cheerily, disappearing in a swirl of leaves.

The team followed with annoyance, wondering what took him so long.

As soon as they found their places on the steps, they glared at him.

"Maa, no need to be so hostile. Why don't you introduce yourselves?" He suggested cheerily, irritating the team even more.

Well, the only reason Shikamaru was irritated was because his nap was interrupted.

"Why don't you go first, Namakemono-sensei?" Ino spoke in a sickly sweet voice.

Naruto failed to hold back a snort, which his fellow blonde seemed to appreciate.

"Me? I'm Kakashi Hatake." He stated simply, completely ignoring the insult.

They waited a moment for him to go on, but he just stared back at them.

"And?" Ino asked expectantly, a vein popping out from her forehead.

"Do you need me to tell you who will go next?" He asked innocently.

Her face grew red with fury.

"How are we supposed to know what to say when all you said was your name?!" Ino shouted exasperatedly, pointing an accusing finger at him.

"Maa, all you had to do was use your words." He said with a cheerful eye-smile. "Hmm... well, my likes and dislikes... I don't feel like telling you. Dreams for the future... never really thought about it. As for my hobbies... I have lots of hobbies." He finished helpfully, sitting on the railing with cat-like balance.

The vein in Ino's forehead looked desperate to escape.

Naruto didn't blame it.

"At least we know what to say now, right?" He pointed out optimistically, attempting to ease her short temper.

Shikamaru sighed softly, starting his introduction to delay the explosion.

"I'm Shikamaru Nara. I like... clouds, green, and Naruto." Said blonde blushed a little at that. "I dislike 'troublesome people', doing troublesome things, and dry grass. My hobbies are cloud watching, shogi and sleeping. My dreams for the future... I don't know, it'd be nice to make Chuunin." He finished lamely, laying on the step and falling asleep with his arm resting awkwardly beneath his head.

_Sleeping is a hobby?_ Naruto thought incredulously. _Never mind that, how does he sleep like that? How is he asleep already?!_

"Ambitious." Kakashi commented sarcastically as he looked at Ino next, who was still fuming from the earlier exchange.

"I'm Ino Yamanaka. I like... strawberries, purple, and Sasuke." She started monotonously, clearly not shy about it. "I dislike slackers..." she looked pointedly at their sensei, then at the sleeping Nara. "And Sakura. My dream for the future is to marry Sasuke and get rich." She stated shamelessly, ignoring the shocked looks her two team members gave her. "My hobbies are training, gardening, reading psychology books and magazines." She finished, looking at Naruto expectantly.

"I'm Naruto Uzumaki! I like ramen, my plants, and Shikamaru. I dislike... 'troublesome people', and Sasuke. My dream for the future is to become a super strong Shinobi! My hobbies are watering my plants, training, and eating different kinds of ramen." He exclaimed energetically, nearly falling off of the small step.

"We have a mission today." Kakashi proceeded to explain the test to them, the only one remaining unintimidated being the fast asleep Nara.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Teamwork was a concept drilled into the Ino-Shika-Cho trio since birth, so despite Ino's relative dislike for a certain loud blonde, she understood the need to work together. No matter what that might mean for her future career.

She was hesitant, really, but in the end Naruto had literally volunteered to be the one without a bell if they managed to get them.

His speech was passionate, and he even told Ino that he would be a distraction so that the other two could snag the bells. This cemented his statement in her mind, and she found herself starting to like his determination.

His claims that a mere bell wouldn't stop him from being an 'awesome Shinobi' were a little over the top, though.

She was about to volunteer to take his place, any Shinobi with that kind of will and heart deserved the Genin rank far more than her, but she hesitated for a moment.

She paused to think when Shikamaru's cunning gaze landed on the same place as her's.

_Genin teams are always in groups of three. Of course, they could also draft someone who did well but didn't graduate, but what would be the point? If they didn't graduate, they wouldn't even be worth testing. This guy... he seems to be testing us for something else, if the suggestion to refrain from eating wasn't just some sadistic trick. This test... it seems designed to turn us against each other. To sabotage our own teammates to complete the mission. That doesn't make any sense! Our teachers in the academy always told us that teamwork was the most important Shinobi skill, not to mention our own families._

It finally clicked in Ino's mind, and she looked to Shikamaru for guidance.

He looked back quizzically, then to the forest, observing a squirrel that was feasting on an acorn.

Ino almost yelled at him, but stopped herself, noticing something weird about the little ball of brown fluff.

It was staring right back, with a familiarly excitable air.

Still, she yelled at him to keep up appearances.

Right as Kakashi had explained everything and set the alarm clock, he pulled out a book and proceeded to do... absolutely nothing.

She sighed, following her lazy teammate who was following the strange squirrel.

They hid in particularly dense foliage a decent distance away, the little squirrel transforming into a Naruto clone.

"I can't believe he hid in the trees for two hours." 'Naruto' complained childishly.

"No use wasting time, Naruto." Shikamaru scolded. "The bell test is designed to pit us against each other, so I had him valiantly volunteer." He explained to Ino. "This gives us a reason to work together, which is what he's looking for. Except, I don't think he wants us to sacrifice Naruto. If you think about the reason for this test, it isn't just about working together. His file said he had a strong policy against leaving a teammate behind, so Ino will give Naruto her bell, and I'll give Ino my bell. Keep in mind that whatever he throws at us, it's all for the purpose of testing our conviction and ability to work together and put each other before ourselves. I would be angry at his expectancy that such a green team could grasp such a concept, but he does have quite the traumatic past and I understand that he feels the need to prevent it from repeating itself." Shikamaru sighed, not used to talking so much. "Naruto will distract Kakashi with a bunch of clones, which I will be among. Ino will provide ranged support, but will refrain from attempting any mind techniques. He is a Jonin, and will not be susceptible to a genin's jutsu, especially those involving the mind. One of Naruto's clones will be henged into a squirrel, which is the smallest animal he can manage thus far. This clone will get close to Kakashi, and once I see that it's close enough, I will use my shadow manipulation jutsu while it grabs the bells. Make sure to be quick, Naruto, I won't be able to hold him long. Maybe two seconds, at most." Shikamaru warned, henging into Naruto and motioning for them to hurry up.

Once the Forest was positively flooded with shadow clones, they charged towards the surprised Jonin. While he was busy admonishing the blonde for thinking quantity could make up for the poor quality of his Taijutsu, which he wasn't aware had been sabotaged, the squirrel-clone made its way to his bells, dodging and weaving stealthily between loud, orangeless clones.

Shikamaru was very proud of that particular change.

The Jonin noticed the squirrel as it came within two feet, and was promptly caught by Shikamaru's perfectly timed shadow.

The squirrel hurriedly leapt for the bells, grabbing both strings in its tiny mouth and slicing them.

Shikamaru caught himself almost nodding at the Jonin, who had went easy on them with both the squirrel and the shadow.

Naruto tossed the bells to his teammates, smiling sadly like the perfect actor he's been all of his life.

Of course, Ino had to pitch in with her own dramatics.

"You deserve this more than I do. Anyone who would volunteer like that... for people they barely know... should graduate." She muttered softly, passing the bell to a 'shocked' Naruto.

Shikamaru tossed his to Ino, glaring at the Jonin.

"What a sadistic bastard." He stated with contempt. "I'm not going to be a genin if this is what it means to be a ninja. No matter what they say in the academy, the mission should never be put before your teammates. If I got to know my team, I could never leave them behind. So, if that's what you expect, I can't live up to your expectations." Shikamaru scowled, stalking towards the entrance.

"So, you did all of that just to walk away?" Kakashi intoned.

"I did all of that to prove a point. I'm sure you, an elite ninja, have just seen what happens when people leave their cherished ones behind." Shikamaru paused, glancing towards Naruto with a genuinely empathetic look.

Kakashi was silent for a moment, then sighed long-sufferingly.

"I always did think it was callous of him, leaving his child behind for a village that didn't deserve it. Even if his godfather did take care of him... which he really shouldn't have expected to happen. He was so smart... but sometimes, he was just so stupid. Though I can't say I'm any better." The jonin's eyes flickered with guilt, but it quickly disappeared. "In any case, you all pass." He eye-smiled, acting like nothing ever happened.

Shikamaru let it go, he wasn't going to say any more.

"What? 'His child behind'? Who?" Naruto asked eloquently.

_So much for that._

"I'll tell you later, Naruto." Shikamaru told him quickly.

Kakashi nodded in thanks, slipping his book back into his pocket.

"We have a mission tomorrow, be in this training ground at six." He says with a feral grin, disappearing in a swirl of leaves.

"He's gotta teach me that..." Naruto gasped, eyes sparkling at the prospect of being able to disappear in an instant. "So who was he talking about?"

"You." Shikamaru scowled. "I can't tell you who your father is. It's an S-rank secret, and I'd be put to death. But, I can tell you that he is both the reason your life turned out like this, and the reason this village is still standing."

"Can you tell me... if he loved me?" Naruto asked quietly, almost whispering as he stared at Shikamaru with eyes that held onto hope by a thread.

He seemed to expect the worst, and that didn't sit well with the Nara one bit.

"I don't know. From what I've been told, I think he did love you. I think... he just believed in people. Believed in them too much, and he really should have known better." Shikamaru sighed, staring into those big, teary eyes with nothing but a shocking desperation to clear the storm broiling inside of them.

"What happened to my godfather? Wasn't... he supposed to take care of me?" Naruto asked, his voice lower and a little darker than Shikamaru would like.

"He manages a spy network outside of Konoha, but despite that, he is fully capable of visiting whenever he wants to. I'm sorry, Naruto, but your father trusted the wrong people." Shikamaru explained with a sigh.

Naruto just stood there, staring at the ground with a hurt expression.

"So, Kakashi-sensei knew?" He asked bitterly, looking up and locking eyes with a- for lack of a better word- vengeful Nara.

Said Nara's face softened at the question, smiling reassuringly.

"Yes, but there isn't anything he could have done. The Third wanted you to live a normal, civilian childhood, so he didn't allow Kakashi to take care of you. At least, that was what he thought. In reality, he was protecting himself from your situation. Anyways, Kakashi did manage to weasel his way into being your private guard, if you might recall him saving your life a few times..." he smiled as the blonde's face lit in understanding. "But unfortunately, the Hokage refused to believe a word he said about the attacks, and started sending Kakashi on long, difficult missions so that he didn't have to hear about it anymore. Sensei couldn't be there for you all the time, but he tried his best." Shikamaru mentally cheered at being able to give Naruto some good news. Well, he cheered as much as a Nara can.

"So, he's someone I can trust?" Naruto asked hopefully.

"You can trust us both, Naruto. We'll see about Ino, but I think she's coming around." Shikamaru assured him, still somehow caught in those brilliant crimson orbs. "We're a team. We're supposed to count on each other, right?"

Naruto's unshed tears from earlier came back in full swing, finally breaking free of their prison, but for a different reason.

"Thanks, Shika!" He shouted happily, tackling the startled Nara in a grateful hug.

The Nara returned the hug after a moment, his smile turning soft.

"No need to thank me. It's about damn time you had someone who cared."


	2. Life Lesson

I'm sorry, I was really nervous about this and... well... there's plenty more excuses, but I'll just get on with it. Nobody wants a ten page author's note... right?

Anyways... I hope this answers your questions, but if you have more, I'll try to work them into the next chapter. This is pretty much an info chapter, and it's not very long, but I'll try to get a bigger one up by next Saturday.

Some of this story will probably sound a little less believable than canon regarding Shikamaru's intelligence, but I think that with above 200 IQ, there's no telling what the hell he's capable of. I'll try not to make him too OP... -_-' but really, if I can come up with a nasty, outrageously amazing plan, then he can too. Other than battle tactics and things like that, his overall motivation is a lot higher than in canon, so I think things will be done a little faster.

**Lauravenclaw**: Sorry, I really should've explained it earlier. He doesn't actually know about Minato being Kakashi's sensei, or why Kakashi took pity on Naruto. I hope this chapter explains everything else, and thank you for pointing this out to me.

**Bluecean**: Spoilers! Shika's not a psychic. That might be a cool idea for another story... MC, psychic Shikamaru. That's one I'd like to see.

Great, monstrous AN concluded. Sorry about the cats...

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Naruto. If I did, he would be blowing Konoha up... repeatedly.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

"Shikamaru! What are you doing? You're going to be late for training!" Naruto whined, poking his friend repeatedly in the shoulder.

"Troublesome. He's going to be at _least_ an hour late. Do I really have to move _now_?" Shikamaru sighed, staring up at the fluffy clouds coasting by on the wind.

_Honestly, how did I manage to uncover so many ridiculous secrets? They really need to increase their security..._

_-Flashback-_

_Shikamaru was sitting in the academy, minding his own business, when a disruptive shout broke through his daydream about clouds._

The red, slitted eyes, the demon and fox related insults, the fact that literally _nothing_ that I know of can make a whole village hate a child more than the famed Kyuubi himself, and now _this_?

It's October tenth, and Naruto is shouting happily about his birthday.

I think this warrants research.

_Shikamaru found himself in the library after school, sneaking into prohibited sections to look for information about the Kyuubi._

_He finally discovered a book on Tailed Beasts, and what he read in there told him everything._

_'Chakra constructs cannot be killed, but they can be sealed into human sacrifices, Jinchuriki. Only a newborn child's chakra system can adapt to withstand the overwhelming burden of a Tailed Beast.'_

_Shikamaru obviously didn't want to get involved, but upon meeting with Naruto after their team assignments, he couldn't ignore it any longer._

_He first searched for Naruto's birth certificate, and found Naruto's relations to Lord Fourth and Jiraiya of the Sannin._

_He researched a bit about Jiraiya, and found that he was a spy master and wrote a series of adult themed books in his spare time._

_Just to be sure, he went to his father._

_"Dad, why does Jiraiya of the Sannin never visit the village?"_

_"He's preoccupied with 'research' for his 'books'."_

_After that, having learned all he needed to about the so-called 'godfather'..._

_"Naruto has so many scars, and he's the Jinchuriki! Does he not have a guard?"_

_His father promptly got up from his spot on the couch and made his way to the Hokage tower._

_After he came back..._

_"He did have a guard, but that guard, your sensei now, told him about the attacks. He dismissed him from the position, and started sending him on S-rank missions to keep him busy. Also..."_

_"What, dad?"_

_"Ah, it's nothing."_

_Shikamaru didn't press any further. His dad didn't withhold information without a reason, and he was pretty sure he knew what that reason was._

_"Why did you tell me about Sensei?"_

_"You should know. A team needs to be able to trust each other, no matter what."_

_-End Flashback-_

Shikamaru still wondered why his father told him. His team was now a flight risk, and a possible danger to the village.

Then again, Shikaku did seem pretty angry...

Not _nearly_ as much as his son was, but still.

_'I'd rather anger the Hokage than a Nara.' _Choji's dad has once whispered to his son, who had instantly relayed it to his best friend in confusion.

Maybe Shikaku was plotting something. Planting the seeds for rebellion in Shikamaru...

He nearly chuckled, shaking his head incredulously and turning the thought around in his expansive mind.

Really, his father wouldn't do something so rash as to leave the delicate art of sweet revenge in his inexperienced son's hands...

Would he?

"Shikamaru, _come on_!" Naruto whined, tugging at his arm.

With a sigh and a muttered 'troublesome', he complied and followed his impatient friend to the barren training ground, thinking of revenge all the while.

"What took you so long?" Ino huffed as they entered the designated meeting place, hands on hips. "What if sensei had shown up on time today?"

Both boys stared at her blankly.

Both proceeded to burst out laughing.

"That's not the point! You guys _forgot_ about me yesterday! You could've warned me before you got all _mushy_..." She grumbled. "And you owe me! I have to keep your stupid secret now!" She said as she pointed an accusing finger at them.

The laughing immediately stopped.

_Did we say anything about the Kyuubi?_

Naruto panicked, glancing at Shikamaru for an explanation.

"What secret?" The Nara asked carefully, his features impassive.

"You know, the whole thing about the Hokage. I can't tell any of my friends, and you guys are like the _only_ people I can actually confide in, and you're _guys_." She ranted, practically hissing the last word.

"What's so bad about that?" Naruto pouted, flopping down on the grass to wait out their teacher.

"Girls are difficult to understand, so we can't effectively comfort her. We'll just say all of the wrong things, and she'll get even more upset." Shikamaru explained for him, hoping he hadn't stepped on any land mines.

Ino seemed pleased enough, and he allowed himself a relieved sigh.

"Exactly. You're about as useful as a wall." She declared haughtily.

"Okay, now that _that's_ settled, why don't we go look for sensei?" Shikamaru proposed, attempting to avoid war between the volatile members of his team.

"I'll send out my clones!" Naruto exclaimed as he made the clone sign, followed by a bunch of popping sounds and a giant cloud of smoke.

Once team Seven was done coughing, the village was swarmed by a hundred transformed Naruto clones.

"That was a _little_ overkill..." Shikamaru sighed tiredly, his energy depleted from the long, tedious task of research.

"Sorry..." Naruto apologized sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck.

The team waited for about ten minutes before a transformed squirrel clone enters the training field, trying to talk without human vocal cords.

"Dude, you're still transformed." Naruto commented exasperatedly to his poor clone, completely oblivious to the implications of his exasperation towards himself.

_Even Naruto can't understand Naruto._

"Ah, sorry 'bout that..." the clone blushed. "But never mind that! You have to see this!" He shouted to his creator, waving his arms around frantically.

"Can't you just _tell_ us?" Naruto asked annoyedly, crossing his arms.

_The irony._

"No, you have to see it!" The clone demanded, motioning for them to follow him.

They obliged, if only to humour the clone.

But, after crossing half of Konoha, they couldn't help but think that the reaction was warranted.

"What... is this?" Ino asked, staring at the crowd gathering before their sensei.

A _crowd_ of _cats_. Just _staring_.

"Are they... in a staring contest?" Naruto asked incredulously, grabbing at his head like it might help him make sense of the situation.

"There was only one when I got here..." the shadow clone whispered as another cat joined the party.

"Is our sensei..." Shikamaru paused, nearly unable to force the words out. "A... _crazy cat lady_?"

"They're just _staring_ at each other. What is this?" Naruto sounds distressed, now blinking repeatedly.

"Aw... here, little kitties..." Kakashi cooed while holding out a raw fish, which was promptly devoured as the cats swarmed him with loud purrs.

"What..."

"No..."

"Aw..."

Were team sevens' simultaneous responses.

Both blondes stared at Shikamaru.

Shikamaru stared back.

"Not a word." He warned, turning his attention to the crowded field of cats while taking his ponytail out, unsuccessfully trying to hide his face with his hair.

While Naruto was ultimately entranced, Ino pestered her teammate.

This continued until Kakashi delicately placed the cats back on the ground, casually throwing a kunai into the bushes where his frightened team was hiding.

"I trust you'll keep this... _between us_?" He growled icily, his tone turning the question into a clear command.

"Yes, sensei!" Team Seven answered hurriedly, scurrying off to their designated training ground in hopes that he might forgive them if they're obedient enough.

The hopes were dashed when the sadistic grin came out to play on Kakashi's face, and the day was followed by the most rigorous training any of them had ever experienced.


End file.
